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My Latest Experience With Dieting
By: Lily Smallwood, SNN Editor
Roncalli Central High School
Port Saunders, NF

Since childhood, I've been a bit on the weighty side. I've never been the slim girl in class. The ‘chunky tomboy'. Now those words described me to a tee. I've always stuck with the looser clothing to hide the bulge (with which I could never win the battle). I thought that if I could hide my figure, the extra tires around my waist wouldn't matter.

Then high school came along and I learned that you can never hide your shape. The screaming comes from under the clothes. It shouts at every other student in the hallway as you pass them. "I'm fat!". The overpowering pressure to be thin that you feel in high school can sometimes push youth to drastic measures. It pushed me over the edge.

When I was in grade seven, I decided to take control of my body and fight my fat. I exercised, dieted, joined all the sports teams and found myself living on low fat foods such as popcorn. In no time, I slimmed down and gained quite the trim waistline for myself. But, in a short while, I noticed that the tires around my waist were returning. This time, I backed down from the fight.

It wasn't until grade ten that I once again felt the need to be svelte. I tried dieting and exercise, but it just didn't seem effective. It was then that I took drastic measures.

It all started with a crazy idea: cut back on my food intake. It seemed like a harmless thing to do, so I started eating less. And less. And less. Soon I was living on small amounts of liquid instead of real food. I was convinced that it was better for me if I drank a glass of juice, instead of eating a proper meal. I'd go a few days without eating a meal and would pat myself on the back. Sure enough, the weight began to melt away, and I was hooked on my new diet plan: starvation.

I'd always heard about anorexia; in school, news, movies and magazines. I never once thought that I could be anorexic. Only deathly-thin, psychologically damaged people were anorexic. With me it was just a simple diet plan. Wasn't it?

After starving myself for a few weeks, I realized that I had no energy and I just couldn't get rid of the flu that I had. In a moment of revelation, I realized the scary truth: I was anorexic and was slowly starving myself to death. The thing that I thought was helping me, was in fact slowly killing me, missed meal by missed meal.

Once I realized that I was destroying myself, I stopped my dieting. I knew that nothing was worth making myself weak and sick. Although sometimes when the scale is up a few pounds, I admit that I get tempted to starve myself for a while. But then I remember that I am beautiful no matter what size I wear. My experience with anorexia has made me realize that I don't need to be slender to be liked and found attractive. Just ask my friends. Or just ask me!